Dragonball Evolution Review, Was it really an evolution?

[Iceindra]

Alright, to get this straight. Did I watch DBE on theaters? No, did I watch it though? YES! I watched it online. It was a Leaked version, but I rather save my money on something else. So lets start this review.

To those who are big fans of Dragonball, those who have grown with it, and maybe even got more into anime because of this, we all know that this was going to be a fail in the end, no matter how hollywood pulled it off. We all know that making an anime, tv show, video game, etc, into a movie is pretty much going to be a horrible mixture of detest, my biggest example is the 5 million dollar Final Fantasy movie that sucks more than a Final Fantasy hentai doujinshi (LAWLS). So did this one become a incredible waste of my time? Lets find out.


STORYLINE:

So it starts off with of course Goku, with his grandfather, Gohan. He's a nerd in high school that daydreams about hot asian girls sucking on strawberries. During his 18th birthday, his grandfather gave him the 4 star dragonball. During his birthday, he goes to a party leaving Gohan alone at home. Piccolo tries to find the dragonball, but realizes that Gohan does not have it and kills him anyways, just to be a jerk. Goku then finds Gohan almost dead where he tells Goku that Piccolo has return, and to look for Master Roshi, of course he needs a last word of wisdom. Thats where Bulma shows up even with the lack of blue, and they try to look for Roshi, the dragonballs, and a way to beat Piccolo in only 1 WEEK.


THE GOOD:

So some people complain that Goku should have been asian. I think its not necessary. Goku is a Sayain, so the truth is he doesn't have to be asian. As for others thinking he was scrawny. First of, its not DBZ where they have biceps the size of soccer balls and their power level reaches OVER 9000!!!! This is dragonball, where goku was 14 and still a little kid, so if anything he atleast resembled Goku when he was scrawny (wonder if that was an insult or a complement). Although the humor was a bit on the cheesy side that I felt I slipped in a dairy factory, it was not that bad. Some parts made me smirk a bit, but generally it didn't try and go overboard, which was a good thing.


THE BAD:
This one might take a while. The movie was WAY short, only around an hour, and for the ground they covered, it was bad. Even though I defended the Goku character before, they still could have found someone better. The storyline was confusing if you ever were a dragon ball fan as it finds a way of you say, "WTF?" from what they like to invent.


THE RANT:

This is going to be the longest part of it, and will include spoilers. First lets start with Goku, I mean to make him a loser in high school makes you say, "Oh, that right. This isn't an awesome anime/manga that I enjoyed, this is hollywood that likes to make the typical loser become incredible and in the end get the girl with very salty romance scenes". The fact how he decides to sneak out of his house to go to a party makes him an emo punk, and then how he's pretty horny the entire movie by always trying to flirt with Chichi instead of train is not Goku. Goku was always pure of heart, and loved to train. Atleast they got the eating food thing right. Goku never liked Chichi until DBZ in a romantic way, and where was his nimbus?

Bulma in this one was a gunslinger, which is not Bulma at all. We all know she was never a fighter, and never have I seen her in a fight before, so a gun really isn't what she was good for. That goes for the entire gang in the DB Chronicles, as I never seen one of them use a real gun. I'm atleast glad she wasn't into Yamcha that much (And we will discuss him later), since he was a loser in this movie (when is he never?). Only beefs I had with the Bulma character, she was also not a great actor to make us believe she was Bulma, be she was sufficient.

Chichi....Chichi...Chichi....HOT! MOVING ON!

The guy who played Yamcha atleast made him seem like a loser as he always was. I atleast liked Yamcha in Dragonball when he knew how to fight with his awesome Wolf Fang Fist, but in this one, he was only a bandit, and a bad one at that. He also got his acting lessons from the back of a cereal box as I literally know people who could have done way better.

Master Roshi being young was the first mistake. Never could understand what he was saying, and he acted like a quiet pervert, and lets get this straight. Roshi has never been quiet of being perverted.

Now for the rest of the story. Goku became Ozaru was the first thing that made me scream. There was no full moon, and Goku did not have a tail. Also, the Ozaru was tiny as hell, and we all know that Ozaru is a large monkey. Also, instead of Gohan dying from Goku, he died from Piccolo, which was another WTF moment. Its also lame how instead of wasting time and looking for the dragonballs, they could have beaten Piccolo with brute force. Who knew?

OVERALL:

So in the end, it was alright. It was average. Nothing more that what I expected from these directors who think they can produce movies, and an anime series at that. The biggest annoyance I had was that it was short and everything was moving too fast, but not fast for a couple of romance scenes, of course. If you try and see this as a remake of Dragonball, your in a big let down, but on its own, it does decent.

In the end, it deserves a 5/10.

[Darkrai Darkness]

My ratings:

Movie: 5/10
Review: 5/10
The Ending of the Movie: 1/10
The ending sucked! It was so quick. They only part I liked whas that Goku screamed HAAAAAAAA for like 10 seconds before he owned Piccolo.

[Loop-Hole]

i think half way through production there like well fuck guys we kinda failed...

[Iceindra]

That would be great if they did that. As the entire movie turned to be a failure.

[Nintendude]

I heard it was okay, but 5/10 is like an F.