Easy Way Out


Britain’s wizarding world is rocked by threats of death and destruction, of Ministry betrayal and supremacy. Lord Vol- . . . He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is already beginning to prepare himself for his spotlight arrival. It's about time he make a grand appearance. Whispers and rumours tend to grow old rather quickly, after all . . . Hogwarts, as always, has scheduled itself to open on the first of September. The school rarely ever seems to be affected by anything dark and ominous these days. The castle gives off quite the pristine look – along with those assurances and well wishes mentioned in the student letters – that have parents preening their children under a false lull. Oh, sure, they’re still sending their dear kiddies away to be taught Charms and Transfiguration beneath the watchful gaze of renowned Hogwarts professors. It’s what happens outside of classes that should give them reason to pause.

If Lord Vol- Ahem. If You-Know-Who plans on sticking around for a while [and let’s face it, why would he feel like leaving?] he’s going to need an army. A new and younger army, one he can depend on as time goes by and his original supporters succumb to old age. Humorous as it may be, he's set his narrow red eyes on Hogwarts, more particularly the eager young up-starts yearning for a chance to stretch their legs and prove their worth. Although Slytherins are generally preferable, Ravenclaws – even Hufflepuffs – have begun to stick their noses into business that normally shouldn’t concern them. But when one insists on a young army one cannot be too picky. Half the little brats usually fade away within the year anyhow.

Appearances can be deceiving. Simply because Hogwarts castle sits isolated between a vast lake, a dark forest, and a range of mountains doesn’t mean it’s too far removed from civilization to be influenced by the goings-on of the world. It’s a common mistake most people tend to make – parents included. Within the circle of teen life – angst, romance, hopeless depression – is a new challenge to face: Life Service. To whom? Use your brain; figure it out. It's not necessarily difficult to get caught up in the chaos when taking into consideration the school’s phony pretence of feeling secure enough to allow unscheduled Hogsmeade visits. The train even runs back and forth from Diagon Alley on weekends for God’s sake. The Headmaster is looking into a new set of rules, however, but in the meantime students have complete access to the outside world. A Greater Good is at their finger tips. Correspondence with the Dark Lord’s followers has them on the edge of signing away their life’s worth. It's probably easier to sign on the dotted line than one would think. Teens, as they’re notoriously known, are often drawn to taking the Easy Way Out.

Lord Vol- . . .Ahem. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named plans on sticking around for a while. He's finally decided it's time for his fifteen minutes of spotlight fame. Rumours and whispers are getting old - and he can't keep his fans waiting very much longer. But to make himself 'current' and to ensure he's an icon for the ages the Dark Lord needs to appeal to the youth of today - the youth of 1976. He is in need of a new and younger army, one he can depend on as time goes by and his original supporters succumb to old age. Humorous as it may be, he's set his narrow red eyes on Hogwarts, more particularly the eager young up-starts yearning for a chance to stretch their legs and prove their worth. Although Slytherins are generally preferable, Ravenclaws – even Hufflepuffs – have begun to stick their noses into business that normally shouldn’t concern them. But when one insists on a young army one cannot be too picky. Half the little brats usually fade away within the year anyhow.

DEs'R us! is a [supposedly] secret club upheld and maintained by select students of the school. Do-Gooders and Goodie-Goodies need not apply. What's needed to join, however, isn't necessarily a pureblooded background check - although that can come in handy; family relations and the right connections can be an asset as well, but we're talking hardcore determination, persistence and loyalty here. These kids are literally foaming at the mouth for that really hip, ultra cool tattoo. It means you've made it in, which in turn means you'll always been sitting on the edge of death . . . But fear not! Groveling for mercy not your thing? Not entranced by the idea of serving a higher someone? Then the DIY Order is probably your cup of tea. Everything your parents ever told you not to do is your mission to achieve, including taking on more than you can handle. Parents not telling you more than you need to know? Find out all you want at the next meeting to make sure you're smack dab in the middle of the action when the Dark Lord's curtain is raised for his centre stage debut.

Now, Hogwarts is generally where the goings-on take place. But let's not forget the vast world beyond the train station. It's not necessarily difficult to get caught up in the chaos when taking into consideration the school’s phony pretence of feeling secure enough to allow unscheduled Hogsmeade visits. The train even runs back and forth from Diagon Alley on weekends for God’s sake. The Headmaster is looking into a new set of rules, however, but in the meantime students have complete access to the outside world. A Greater Good is at their finger tips. Correspondence with the Dark Lord’s followers has them on the edge of signing away their life’s worth. It's probably easier to sign on the dotted line than one would think. Teens, as they’re notoriously known, are often drawn to taking the easy way out.

Reminder: Be sure not to sign anything dodgy looking until you've read the fine print. And if you can't read the fine print chances are you won't want to sign at all. But hey, incentives of glory and wealth are still considered worthwhile causes when giving one's life away in the name of Dedicated Service.

_{*The Dark Lord is not responsible for any deaths and/or injuries that may arise as a result of your serving him. You signed on the dotted line. You should have been a better example of unfailing loyalty.}